have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.