Being fat

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

When I am bored I look at things and wonder about the people who made them, and at what time they were made, etc. Like whether my Bic pen was made in the morning or the night. Savy.

Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

Make sudden movements in the mirror to try and catch out my reflection.

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.