Use my phone to see what time it is

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.