When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

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When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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When I find a new song I like, I listen to it over and over and over; >>Until I run that sh*t into the ground.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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Unable to be near my cat without petting her or talking to her.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

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Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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You think someone is reading your mind and hurriedly change what your thinking to something normal

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.