- Things You Think Only You Do

If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

Learning a definition of a word and after that seeing it everywhere.

get annoyed when the pop-up lid on the dish soap bottle is left up

How funny would it be if plants were trying to kill us but they move too slow to get us

shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

I used to eat bath bubbles

Pulling the same faces as the character you are reading currently is.

I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.