- Things You Think Only You Do

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

sometimes sigh sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

Take pieces of loose hair and keep it in a plastic bag in my wallet so if I ever get killed and my ID stolen, my body can still be identified.

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.