- Things You Think Only You Do

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

I have a phobia of incest

Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

When your watching a YouTube video and you have to watch an AD, you mute it and turn your head away because your just that pissed off at the company.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

When you lie in bed and imagine scenarios that will never happen.

That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.