get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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I cant ride a bike

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.