Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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I mean Diana Ross.

Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

Lay in bed , and think what i could of said while i was talking to my crush or what could of happen.

Sometimes I toot.

When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

I try to not step on the lines on the sidewalk

Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.