Use my phone to see what time it is

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

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Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Sometimes I toot.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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Look at adigital clock sideways when in bed while tryingto sleep and try to make the numbers look like faces

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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Sometimes hold a piece of chocolate between your fingers until it melts then lick the yummy gooeyness off your fingers

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.