check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

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check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.