- Things You Think Only You Do

I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

Courtesy flush.

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

sometimes sigh sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Know almost every line from spongbob episodes.

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.