Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

I like making subliminal messages (givemeyourmoney)

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

Hope that one day your closet will have a secret world like Narnia...

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

I mean Diana Ross.

Fall down the stairs, bounce on your ass to the bottom, feel scared, then want to DO IT AGAIN! Get pwned at a game, rage, look at your cat sitting beside you, looking back, and say "What?"

Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

fall asleep in the shower.

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

I hate being called "buddy".

Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.