Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

I was not born in the country I am living in now

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

I was the real Stig...

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.