When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

When in a outhouse I get scared that I can't unlock the door. This one time in the winter the lock froze and I was almost stuck

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Whenever I get sweaty I put baby powder around my groin area and under arms. Ramos

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

Emmy Jackson Y U ALWAYS ANGRY WHEN SOMEONE SAY HI

I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.