I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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i masturbate with my feet

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When I'm watching something or playing something and the character goes underwater, I hold my breath until the character reaches the surface. This is weird as hell, does anyone else do this?

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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I blow my nose in my towel after i dry off. Then use the same towel the next day. lol

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Sitting on toilet after pooping without wiping for longer than a minute because your in your phone.

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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i open the cuboard door tosee if theres anything to eat and if theres nothing there i close it and go to the fridge if theres nothing there i go back to the cuboard =)

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.