- Things You Think Only You Do

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

Love the natural smell of my dog's paws.

Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

When I can't find my phone so I panic and shearch everywhere only to find out it was in my pocket.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

always get sports injuries, never get any attention from them

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.