It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Whenever I go to close the door to my room, I give the wall opposite me a hard, intimidating stare just in case an invisible person was watching me.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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When I was a kid and I misbehaved when my dad used to smack me I would put emphasis in my cries to let him think that I got the lesson.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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When I meet someone random, and have a small conversation, and then when they leave, I feel sad because I think I am never going to see them again.

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Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.