when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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I don't use my car air conditioning because I think it's wasteful and it might "run-out" when I'm REALLY, REALLY hot.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

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The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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When in a public toilet, I never leave the cubicle until everyone is either out of the room or in their own cubicle.

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

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wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.