Walking into the little door at the store that people put the carts though.

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smoke marijuana

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get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Sometimes I unintentionally mouth the words being spoken on TV.

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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At the peak of orgasm, i used to think that im making out with someone else (like my crush) to make me cum.

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whenever you walk into the bathroom with your phone/laptop/electronic device you stay sitting on the toilet even though you are done because you are so engaged with whatever you are doing

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get caught up in youtube comment arguments

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See someone walking or in their car driving then imaging what they're doing next or imagine the rest of their life.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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Watch scary movies even though your afraid of the dark.

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I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

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Say what even when u heard someone

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.