Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Your mom. Just kidding everyone does her.

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Sometimes I like to count the amount of steps it takes to get upstairs/downstairs. Then I realize that the number is never the same.

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

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Thinking you smell really bad and then putting to much deodorant/perfume/ect and you still think you smell bad. Is this just me?

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I am convinced that nobody had opened bacon or packets of ham with the flappy corner because it dosnt work!! So i get a knife and saw it out.

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When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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getting self conscious when wearing a hoodie because you start pitting out and you can start to smell BO...

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Turn the fan and/or sink on in the bathroom to drown out the noise from masturbating.

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Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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I wake up suddenly in the middle of the night with a feeling that I'm falling

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I wonder sometimes if I've ever met my future self.

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toilet:a place for reading and going on fb shower:place for singing school:place for sleeping and fuck others.internet:place for shitting brixs.

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

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When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

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Randomly think odd scenarios in your head and say if that happened this is what i would do and then forget about it the next day

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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After watching a video of someone doing something tiring, I always feel tired in whichever body part they were using in the video

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.