Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

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At the store then mom leaves to get something then u start panicking as the cashier begins paying and you thing she will charge yo already

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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When you fart in class but try to cover it up by moving around so other people think it was just the chair squeaking.

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When it's 12:59 or 4:59 or something:59, I don't let myself blink/breathe until it's 1:00 or 5:00 or something:00. Anyone?

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whenever you walk into the bathroom with your phone/laptop/electronic device you stay sitting on the toilet even though you are done because you are so engaged with whatever you are doing

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I wake up suddenly in the middle of the night with a feeling that I'm falling

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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I shove food in my face like an animal when I'm home alone instead of eating like a normal person.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

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Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"

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stare at someones face until they distort and then wonder why they are asking me why I'm smiling.

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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i have my own way of eating every chocolate bar i eat, layer by layer

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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I like to eat the crust on pizzas

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

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When I'm on an escalator going up, I always imagine myself falling back and how incredibly painful (and possibly bloody) it must be.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.