watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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After washing butt, turn my butt towards the shower and spread butt cheeks apart to wash the soap out of my crack.

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I often think I have the greastest taste in everything

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Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

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When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

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After watching a video of someone doing something tiring, I always feel tired in whichever body part they were using in the video

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I tend to stand in front of mirrors and stare at myself to the point of my face changing to a more evil look than normal and freaking myself out, and forcing myself to either look away, or down.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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stare at the same gender for a long time and think 2 urself "am i gay?" and when they look at you, you tun ur eyes another way!

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whenever I lucid dream, I find that I don't do much

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suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

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When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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Go to the kitchen to eat, forget what I'm doing, go back to whatever I was doing, and realizing that I'm hungry.

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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get embarrassed when someone is in the public bathroom, and your shit makes a splash in the toilet

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When an awkward situation arises, pull out my phone and aimlessly flip through the apps to pretend I'm busy doing something

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having cool friends, but all of their other friends are nerds.

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.