Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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Sometimes I stop typing in the middle of a sen

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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I sit in my sink and pretend that I am water.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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Think that everything you do is life is being recorded by secret cameras and you're on a reality show. But you don't actually know. The Truman Show. -Robert

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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pretend you died to see what your dog would do.

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Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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I lay in bed at night with my eyes closed but not asleep,and my mind will tell me that thier is someone standing by my bed,i will think and say to myself,im not looking because thats ridiculous. Then after a 30 seconds pause,have a quick peep.

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

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Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.