When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

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I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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When out I like to "people watch."

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.