When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

think that the whole world is a dollhouse and we are being controlled by giant people above who live in a whole differnt world

Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

When out I like to "people watch."

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

Look at pictures of people who lived a long time ago and wonder how they lived without television and the Internet.

always check thde back seat before starting the car

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

Whenever there is a volume button on something i have to make sure its on a number 5 ie: 0,5,10,15

i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

open the fridge A eat food B think

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.