stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

when watching a movie or tv show, i think i am the main character and when it does somthing stupid i become embaressed

Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

I think about doing evil things to people then i tell the person about it nikki

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

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I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

I apologize, when i bump against things.

When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

Read shampoo bottle when no magazine in bathroom.

Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

suddenly get stage fright when in a public bathroom stall and break the awkward silence by pretending you just went in there to get loo paper to blow your nose.

Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.