- Things You Think Only You Do

Race the microwave. Not literally, by the way.

I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

When I use deodorant, I flap my arms like a chicken a couple of times to get some air moving under there...

Drink a huge amount of water only for the pleasure of having your stomach filled with it.

Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

Convince yourself that all of your friends are partying together without you when they dont respond to your text messages.

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

I have memorized most commercials and recite them when they come on the tv.

I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

Spell Checktells me I spelt something wrong even though I am certain it's right.

I always paranoidly think that someone else might see what I see through my eyes he can't hear what I hear and he can't smell what I smell he can only see and if I close my eyes he falls asleep automatically I try to avoid thinking this but that's impossible

Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

Get really annoyed when something interrupts your yawn... then try and force yourself to complete the yawn

Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

Whenever I'm scared at night in my room I turn on music. Because the music will keep away people trying to get me. Obviously.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.