????????????????????C?????????

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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Decide to think about important things in the shower, but continually lose the train of thought and eventually give up.

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I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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When realizing i'm being a little bitchy, I laugh and smile right after my sentence to make myself seem a little nicer.

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Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

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When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

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I wish I can go somewhere where there is no influences trying to get me to buy a product or be a certain way

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check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

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When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

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Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

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Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

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when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.