- Things You Think Only You Do

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

When you say bye to someone and keep walking in the same direction, and then its really awkward...

Call out the mistakes I see drivers make in front of me.

Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

When you're alone in a room and you have to turn on the TV so it's not as silent...

When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.

When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

While watching a movie, I hold my breath whenever there is a scene with the main character underwater just to see how long i would last in that situation.

get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.