Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

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I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

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Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

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I feel like people next to me can read my mind so if I start thinking about something sexual it feels super awkward

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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When you sit down to use the toilet, start, and then realize that the window is open and people can hear you.You then either search for something to mask the sound or proceed to relieve yourself by making as little noise as possible (ultimately failing)

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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Saving my cash this year and not buying into the shopping hype

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.