Check the lint filter on the dryer every time I walk into the laundry room.

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

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When I drop something, I stand there and watch it fall, I stand still because I'm afraid that I'll maybe mess up something else, instead of picking it up quickly. Am I the only one? ;)

Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

when riding home on my bike with music on pretenend im in a race with no1 and commentate on iend get really exccited on the last straight especielly when a rocky soundtrack song comes on

When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

Listen to song and think of a great montage that would go with it.

When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

Being afraid to close your eyes when you're washing your hair in the shower because you think a murderer will be right there when you open your eyes again. That or Scared to shower when your home alone at night.

I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

when i piss in the toilet, i flush half way through and race the toilet to the finish.

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

I really enjoy spending my birthday alone. I never told anyone that.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.