I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

call someone by a siblings name.

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

Only I CAN TYPE FUCKlNG FUCKlNG FUCKlNG AS MANY FUCKlNG TIMES I FUCKlNG WANT! Moral the friendly r*pist: FUCKlNG COOL!

Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

Search up google on bing or yahoo because i feel that google is so much better

Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

Pee in the shower

I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.