- Things You Think Only You Do

I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

When i close the refrigiator door, i re-open it and give it a good shove to make sure it tight.

Search for blackheads on your arms for hours just because youre bored!

when you get a runny nose suddenly checks for blood oh good its clear

I hate being called "buddy".

I am 23 and I still wish the stalk will take back my younger brother

only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

call someone by a siblings name.

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

I masturbate with sandpaper

Before drinking the actual soft drink, I drink the fizz as fast as I can.

Sometimes I would just be thinking to myself and then think of something funny and laugh but I don't share it with anyone else makes me look insane.

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.