My daily agenda: wake up take a crap get out of bed...

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Doing something private and think "What if my mom/dad/boss etc. saw me now?"

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Pass wind after i ate lasagna.

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When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.