When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

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Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

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I chew around the center of carrots.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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I always walk down the hall James Bond style. Gun out, along the wall, looking around corners before I walk into or by a room.

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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When someone starts waving and saying hi then I start waving and saying hi even though I have no idea who it is only to realize they are actually waving at someone behind me.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

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Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.