When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -68

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

thumb_up thumb_down -74

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Having the tv on always, just for background noise. Doesn't work with a computer/laptop, must be the tv.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

thumb_up thumb_down -102

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I meow when my cat meows.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

when u get something right and do a victory dance and the person to u is just like "da hell?"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Feel the bed gets more comfortable the longer you put off getting into bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I hate being called "buddy".

thumb_up thumb_down -39

When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

thumb_up thumb_down -39

After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.