i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

Touching that door knob three times before opening the door.

It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

Think about breathing...

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

Start thinking about my blinking and feel that I am blinking weird

Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

Look at my poop before flushing

When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

Think about having sex with the dog. You wouldn't, but what if you did?

I look behind me and out of my window every 10 minutes while I'm sitting at my desk because I'm scared something's gonna be there.

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.