check shower for murder then pee

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

call someone by a siblings name.

Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

Pretend my life is a videogame.

Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

Sometimes cringe at the sound when other people scratch themselves

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

Think about breathing...

collect kleenex boxes for the cool designs

Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

I sometimes put posts not just of things I do but also of things I know other people do

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.