Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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when a sex scene comes on the tv i try make up an excuse to go somewhere like i need a drink or a pee.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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Trying on other people's clothes at the gym/laundromat when they ain't looking!! (^_^)

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Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

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pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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Playing with a tiny piece of loose skin in the middle of my upper lip.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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Only read the shortest sentences on "Things You Think Only You Do". More than 2 sentences I skip.

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Remove all the stupid gobbldegook words that the captchas from this site add to my predictive text.

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Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.