If I have a top comment and I see someone else does, I upvote both of ours; friendly competition.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

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check shower for murder then pee

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Being able to scare people by awkwardly standing behind them

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If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

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I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

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When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

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Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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wen on this website go look at the most disliked

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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I meow when my cat meows.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.