I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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when something is lost you check the spot they or it should be at least 5 to 10 times

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

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Own all of you hard! Moral: EXPLOSION NOISE!

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

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being a mid-teenager, never having a relationship before and don't care at all.

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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ASMR

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After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

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When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

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when someone is talking about something i have no idea of and then asked me if i agree I'm like: oh yes! and then promptly changing subject so they won't find out

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I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Take everything out of the fridge, and climb in it, and pretend your in a time capsule.

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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Getting that huge shiver when you take a really good pee.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.