When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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If I see a shriveled, dried leaf while walking along the sidewalk I am compelled to step on it and make it crunch.

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when someone mispronounces something I say the correct pronunciation quietly under my breath so it doesn't bother me

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Do an epic air drum solo while listening to Phil Colins "In The Air Tonight"

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Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

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When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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Stare at people until they notice, and when they notice watch them out of the corner of your eye until they turn.. and then you continue staring

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Laugh softly when you hear someone else cry

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

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sing really loud to songs in the car, but stop when people are right next to you at stoplights.

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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you know that when things have only one like on this site, the people who wrote it liked it

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Change the channel during commercials when you have the remote, when you don't you go insane and say "TURN IT BACK WE'LL MISS THE START!!!"

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Check the time on my cell phone, put it back in my pocket. Dammit, didn't see the time. Check it again.

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try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

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i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Think the "D" in the Disney logo was actually a "G", and realized that thought process at an age to embarassing to divulge to complete strangers on the internet.

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Pee in my work garbage can.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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Laughing randomly because you remembered something that was funny earlier

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Feel all cool and look suspiciously at everybody else while leaving the theater after a good dramatic movie.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.