Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

I avoid my wealthy but cool relatives because I don't want them to think I want money

Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

Turns the bathroom sink water on so no one hears you pee nikki

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

Stab myself on a daily basis

When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

Rub boogers under the arm rest on the couch.

Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.