apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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On YouTube when I go to like a comment or a video. I click the Like button 2 or 3 times just to make sure it went through.

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I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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When I'm in a car holding a handheld device (iPod, Cell Phone, etc.) I have a feeling I will randomly throw it out the open window. I would never do this, but I'm still afraid I might.

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

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when u see a blond, brown,black,or red head girl u think of a blond,brown,black or red head joke -Randi L.

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How is it that celebrities no one likes keep popping up on shows everyone likes

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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I flick through the channels on my TV really fast to try and make a complete sentence.

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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Whenever I order a lot of food at a fast food place for myself, I order an extra drink just so they think it's for two people.

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Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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Pee in the shower

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Massive hang-over. Say out loud and promise I will never drink like that again. Next time drink atleast as much as the last time.

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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wonder why the word "MORTGAGE" has a T in it?

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Naming every pet you've ever owned Peter Jankins

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I never look out the window at night because I'm afraid there will be an Alien staring at me when I move the curtains.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.