Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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YEET! TURN UP! KEEP IT ONEHUNNIT DADDY!! YAS GAGA YASS!! SIGN ME UP FOR THAT!! PU$$Y ON FLEEK!! PULLOUT GAME STRONG! LARRY IS REAL!! IMMA LET YOU FINISH!! IMMA REAL G! HOLYMOTHERFUCKINGSHIT!!!!!! I SAID HA! BITCH WHERE??? GIVE ME SOME ASS!! WHAT ARE THOOOSE!!! WHERE THEY AT THO?! BITCH BETTA HAVE MUH MONEY! FCK HER RIGHT IN THE PSSY! EAT THAT BOOTY LIKE GROCERIES!!!!! SURFBOARD! IM NOT GAY NO MORE! WHO'S YOUR DADDY? HOW YOU LIKE DEM APPLES?!! QUEEN! SLAY!

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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after a shower, try to shake the water off.

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"Turn the tv volume with my feet" "Take a wood stick and think it's a sword"

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Put a few bits of toilet paper in the toilet before having a poo so there is no splash!

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

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Thinking about different guys and how they would be in bed, then thinking im a slut for thinking it...

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When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

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Repeat the phrase "you too" after a comment someone makes that does not apply. Bob: happy birthday Jim Jim: you too bob. Awwww sh!t.

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ASMR

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.