Use a signature that automatically gets me hundreds of red thumbs... Yeah that moral crap...

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

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Thinking our singing voices are amazing, until we record it and play it back.

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Waking up from a really bad dream that you thought was real and then thinking about it all day worried that it actually happened

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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Sometimes when I go to a drive in restaurant, and get an order of fries, I empty the bag out, and there are a few fries in the bottom of the bag. I Enjoy those the most, as I feel they were free

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When you can't use your hand to push a door, kick it and say "THIS IS SPARTA!!!"

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Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

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Type in "Things you think only you do" then feel better that alot of people do the same stupid or smart things.

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When i play a video game and make some stupid noobish action including suiciding or playing in a lame way, i make sure that if somehow someone sees my screen, he/she notices why i do so.

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I make a joke and laugh a little but if someone else laughs then i laugh louder

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Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.