get bored so I fist myself for money

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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run inside after taking out the trash because a monster might be hiding in the big trash can

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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Try to imagine every couple I see having sex.

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scream after your in the ooh part of achooh when you sneeze.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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cut corners when walking not because it's faster, but because it's more efficient

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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Skip peeing before bed because you dont feel like it, knowing that in about 15 minutes youre going to have to get back up because you wont be able to fall asleep until you go pee.

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.