I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

I eat food when i'm bored..

Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

Wash my hands after i use the toilet.

when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

Your mom

Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

When i get a back shiver. That's when i know something bad going to happen.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

Create a post on this site, and then feel really depressed when I get a ton of thumbs down, even when I give MYSELF a thumbs up.

Sometimes I have a dream in the morning that I checked my clock but then when I wake up Im perplexed when Ive gone back in time -Ethan

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.