When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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I sometimes try to summon things with the force of my thoughts...I would be so useful...but no way, nothing ever moves.

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I get creeped out if I haven't looked at a clock in a while and when I finally do it reads 9:11

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Check the toilet paper after wiping your ass

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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While watching a movie, I imagine that same movie in my mind only replacing the characters with different ones from other series or videogames that I like. It just seems to make the movie better.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

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when I go shopping I go in the store, get what I need and then I leave I don't browse.

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sit in the shower

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Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"

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only turning the TV volume to numbers ending in 5

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

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Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.