Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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Can't stand it if something rubs against my knees up the way...if it happens i have to rub them down the way with my hands or they feel weird

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Picking my nose.

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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Sometimes I imagine how everyone would react if I died.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

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wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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If a donkey and a angle fish where to pro create what would be the out come? They can't mate a donkeys a mammal and a angle fish is a fish

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get a new *to you* car, and suddenly every other car on the road is the same make/ model..... hey look! an outback!

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At night when alone in my bed...I sometimes pretend like I got hit by a car or something, and my loved one is there with me...and I act out my last words...and how I would act. I've done this occasionally since I was 5. With different scenario's. Schmee

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I stand under my ceiling fan, looking up while spinning around to make it look still...

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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i take words i just read or said and sing them to the tune of a song

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.