Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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when im on my phone in bed my phone always falls on my face -.-

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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im going to rape that girl

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Why are the rich so friggin unhappy?

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wonder who wrote these things

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when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

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When a male dies and screams in pain in a movie, I feel normal about it. When a female does, I feel bad and want to help.

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Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

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sing like a pro in da shower

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When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.