While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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I have short haircuts so I don't have messed up hair in the morning (It's a real time saver)

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Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

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Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

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Instead of scratching my balls with my hand I rub them vigorously on the bed

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Create a post on this site, and then feel really depressed when I get a ton of thumbs down, even when I give MYSELF a thumbs up.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

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When I need to poop in a public toilet, I poop to the side so there's no plop.

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One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while

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Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.

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I sometimes start moving my hands around "making them fight" pretending they are tiny fighters.

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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When i wake up from a good dream, i close my eyes and imagine the ending in different ways.

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When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.