Dip my pizza crust in my soda

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I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

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Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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When I'm in a hurry I brush my teeth while peeing because I think it saves time.

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mentally scolding yourself for thinking something dirty just in case the person you're thinking about can read your thoughts

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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I hold my boobs if I'm running upstairs and not wearing a bra.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Peeing in the shower

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Sometimes after a long, hard day or when something bad happens I just sit down and cry in the shower.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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sometimes when I listen to a song while riding in the car I look out the window and pretend I'm in some angsty music video

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When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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Aim at shit stains whilst I pee.

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Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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Sittig on a table donating sperm to my friend gabe

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At home stay on the toilet a few minutes after you finish your business

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I rape small children ;).

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.