Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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Leave coins on the floor in the corner when I have a party to see if there is a petty thief around

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Wonder if anyone doesn't actually talk to themselves for some reason or another at some point in their life. (If so, how can talking to yourself be the first sign of madness? So many people do it...)

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing.

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Two minutes after I text the person I like, I check the message to see what time I sent it and what time the person received it, and estimate that it takes the adverage person about a minute to respond and then another minute for you to receive it. so really, if the person likes you, it would take them about 3 minutes to respond. if its five, you automatically assume they hate you.

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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Sometimes I wonder if the blue/green/red etc. I see is the same blue/green/red etc. you see

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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laziness .... its all in the mind

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Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

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i have conversations in my head about showing someone some music and end up playing specific parts of various songs on my ipod and memorise the timings just in case it does happen

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

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When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

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Not knowing whether to change it or not on a scantron test when the same letter appears more than 3 times in a row: A D C C C C .....but all the of my answers make sense!

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I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

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Suppress a sneeze and then walk around unsatisfied.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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At any time of day, when i'm not busy, someone you know pops into your head and you start talking to them telepathically, but not for long, then you realise that youre just plain crazy? anyone?

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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dont turn my fan up so high cause i think its going to fall and slice me to bits -jesse

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.