when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Shutting the fridge door slowly just to see the light shut off.

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Thinking of a song to get an annoying one out of your head, then realizing that one's even worse.

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

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I yawn on command… and hate it. –Ikka

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You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

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Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

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When I'm home alone, I pretend I'm famous, and pretend I'm doing a television or magazine interview, and answer out loud to questions I ask in my head

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when im alone i pretend to sniper zombies out my bedroom window

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Courtesy flush.

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Fart at work when I'm pretty sure no one will come to that area soon.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

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Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

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I always feel chinese accents are unintelligent.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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log off the internet then think of something and go back on

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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Walk away in the middle of a sitcom and then play the rest out of the episode in your head while doing something else.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.