Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Lying in be and pretending you are in a tv show, the characters best friend, playing it out in your mind. Or you dream while awake, and you control it, and you fly to Hollywood and become your faborite celebrities best friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

thumb_up thumb_down +53

When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If there's leaves on the ground and the wind picks it up and makes like swirls I put my arms out to make it seem I'm controlling the swirls.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I imagine that there are lines coming out from things and I don't step on the lines (columns, buildings, walls, corners, etc.)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whenever I lost a tooth my parents would while I slept they would sprinkle caster sugar on the window sill and make footprints in it (tiny footprints)

thumb_up thumb_down -50

rub the underside of your ear lobe to smell the odd smell.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Whenever I leave a phone message, I feel like I'm leaving the last message I will every leave to my family in my life because I will somehow die soon. I've watched too much drama.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I piss in the bed every night

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I know how to type a ¿

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Having a deja vu, swearing you've seen something before.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

fart

thumb_up thumb_down -22

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Whenever I'm doing my makeup I pretend I'm doing a makeup tutorial on Youtube.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.