Eating a crunchy food while watching tv and turning up the volume little by little until its around 80% because you can't hear over the sound of your own chewing. Then later when you turn back on the tv you scare yourself because it's still at 80% and frantically try to turn it down with super speed before anyone hears you.

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Sometimes at night, I find myself imagining people I know saying my name, trying to get my attention in my head. They won't stop until I respond out loud.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When at a red you watch the light real close and as soon as it turns green you try to beat the other cars to the other side of intersection

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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Tried to suck ur own penis

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When looking at these comments, don't like the ones with lots of comments on because you think they have too many and the others deserve your liking as they might feel left out.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

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rub the underside of your ear lobe to smell the odd smell.

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When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

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When in class, hoping that I do not get boner right before bell rings/called up.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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Whenever I order a lot of food at a fast food place for myself, I order an extra drink just so they think it's for two people.

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You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

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sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.