Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

Pee while setting down even if your a dude.

think something you shouldn't, then stop thinking it, because someone might read your mind

I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

I make it sound like i'm ordering for more than one person when I'm really only getting fast food for myself.

Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

Always think good thoughts before I go to bed so that I have good dreams

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

Try and accomplish something before the timer on the microwave beeps :)

when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

If I hear a noise, it obviously means there is a monster somewhere in/near my bedroom and the sheets will protect me as long as they cover up to my chin.

Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

my favorite singer is Bles Bridges 22/07/1947-24/03/2000

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

Giving my dog a massage.

Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

draw little triangles while coulouring in to make it seem that theres not so much work -jesse

When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

I split my gum in half so I can chew on both sides.

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.