Try to imagine every couple I see having sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -111

You know how there is that sound that gives you the shiver? Whenever you here it you shiver and tell that sound maker to shut up, but then can't stop thinking about that sound and find people looking at you and saying "Is it really that cold?" And then you stop thinking about the sound. P.S. I would like to say I have never relized how weird I am! This site has revealed my inner weirdness! -Astrid

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I'm really picky about how I earn money

thumb_up thumb_down -57

On a calendar search for the picture on your birthday month

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

thumb_up thumb_down -115

When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

i would air drum even if theres no music playing

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

thumb_up thumb_down -101

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Go to someone's house and go and ask where something is and the person you ask just tells you without getting up (I know it doesn't go with the theme of this site but its just something annoying)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Don't make a sound when sitting in the stall and someone walks in; and in turn, don't say anything to the person in the stall even if you know who it is!

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

thumb_up thumb_down -7

type "haha" because lol is too gay...but slip sometimes and type lol anyway lol....

thumb_up thumb_down -80

When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

thumb_up thumb_down -10

refuse to like a post because the number is too perfect and you don't want to screw it up

thumb_up thumb_down -48

I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

When you say something you think is funny but it turns out that it's only funny in your head so once you say it there's this moment of awkwardness and everyone else probably just forgets about it but it haunts you for the rest of your life. ~

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

thumb_up thumb_down -99

eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.