Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

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Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

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Whenever I'm home alone, I dance and sing along to any commercial.

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thumb down this post

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Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

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hallo

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

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Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

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If I'm at work and have to poop, when I get in the stall I look under the opening at the bottom for any other feet in the other stalls to make sure I am alone. I always think what if when I do that someone else does it at the same time.

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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When I wipe after taking a poo I always get excited when there is no extra poo to be wiped off...yea...don't judge

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do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.