When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

sometimes when im in the shower and i hear the slightest bump i look behind the curtains to see if anyone is about to scare me

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

always check thde back seat before starting the car

Point your finger to the sky When your favorite comes on in the club or on the radio

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

If I have my computer and I have to do something quietly (because there are other people about) I hear music in heaphones, just so it seems to myself that I'm more discreet, as I can't hear myself.

Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

I get creeped out if I haven't looked at a clock in a while and when I finally do it reads 9:11

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

WHEN I SHOW YOU A PICTURE ON MY PHONE..DON’T SWIPE LEFT.DON’T SWIPE RIGHT.JUST LOOK. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

I pee on the bathroom sink everytime, because I am lazy to open the toilet, even when I visit other people, sorry friends and family =)

When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

When my cat follows me, I pretend we're a pack or some sort of gang and i would be the leader.

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

Walking around near loud music and begin to feel like your walking to the beat.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.