forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

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Locking your pet in the room and forcing it to spend time with you.

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Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

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When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

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Get longingly desperate feeling for days/weeks after a concert of my favorite band.

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Smelling food to see if its spicy.

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Spinning around to get dizzy, then spinning the other way to try and undo it.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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Sit there with my hand just resting down my pants casually when I'm alone. It's comfy!

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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After a meal if I need to use a toothpick I would eat the piece of food I "picked".

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

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I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.

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I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.