When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

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Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

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When someone sits with crossed legs, I notice their lifted foot throb slightly with their pulse. It is really distracting sometimes.

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log off the internet then think of something and go back on

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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Eat ice by itself

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I make a conversation with myself when looking at mirrors !

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A stranger makes me mad. Spend all day thinking about badass things that I should have done/said.

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pee in my pants on purpose for the fun of it

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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A bee flies into your classroom and you're too terrified to focus on anything else.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.