When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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Sitting down in the shower

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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While driving out in the country area, I am secretly looking for Squatch

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Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

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Watching tv with family/friends and laughing at something on the show, and then feeling awkward because no one else laughed.

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Make up a song to yourself.

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Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

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I apologize, when i bump against things.

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When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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when im in a public toilet and my freinds outside i make loud converstation with them so they cant hear me pee.

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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i feel relived after i prick and see that hard-white thinggy that oozes outside my annoying acne.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

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While in bed, I cover my head with my bed sheets because it makes me feel safe from monsters.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.