Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

Say something in my head, but then wonder if i said it out loud and just didn't realize.

Make up a song to yourself.

Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

When I'm alone, I just randomly say "I know you're there so I would look awesome if someone was actually there.

Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

I brush my teeth in the shower and use the shower for a waterpik.

think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

When i am bored i go on the internet and i dont know what to do but as soon as i turn off my computer i come up with lots of fun things i could have done

Go into a card shop, laugh hysterically at the funny ones, then leave. Then whilst walking down the street, you think of them again and burst out laughing. This is highly embarrassing when you're alone!

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

Every time I see people's bare feet I'm automatically counting their toes to make sure if they have an extra toe or two.

I just saw the D in Disney for the first time ever. My brain always saw a backwards G. I knew it was supposed to be a D, I just never bothered to fix it. There has been a G there my whole life.

when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

When it is raining and a sad song comes on the radio, I look out the window and pretend I am in a movie. -Cocobear

Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.