Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

Log onto facebook, notice a family member is also logged on, and immediately log off before they trap you in a never-ending facebook chat.

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

Constantly hearing your name in public and asking "did you just hear my name?"

close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

I see something glittery, someone tells me not to pick it up because I'll glitter all over myself, I pick it up anyway and glitter all over myself.

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

I poke myself in the eye with a needle every Thursday.

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

Think about breathing...

when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

turn off the alarm clock one minute before its goes off when you wake up in the morning

sneeze without closing my eyes

When watching television, I give people I don't like the finger

when i have to go down stairs at night, i have to sprint up the stairs in case there are ghosts/monsters never dangle my feet over the bed in case something tickles/touches them

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.