When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.

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Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

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Pee extra hard in a urinal when there's someone else in the bathroom so you don't seem weak

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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Mix my coffee with the spoon upside down.

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

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I wipe the part of the glass or water bottle i drink from

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When I'm scared in the shower sing

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Seeing a cartoon character eat something makes me hungry for it even though it may not taste good in real life and I know that.

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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Go outside and pee.

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Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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did you notice if you travel: when your going to the place feels like 10 hours but when going home feels like 4 hours

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whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

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I try to accomplish things while waiting for the timer on the microwave can go off.

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eat chicken, lamb anything with bones with a knife and fork while avoiding using your hands because it makes them dirty

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.