I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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Saying something stupid and then claiming it was an inside joke so you don't look stupid.

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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pick your nose and eat it

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Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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working out escape routes for each room in your house when you're alone, just in case

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I plant my feet firmly when the subway approaches in case a random stranger tries to kill me by pushing me in front of the train.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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Think the "D" in the Disney logo was actually a "G", and realized that thought process at an age to embarassing to divulge to complete strangers on the internet.

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SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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thumb down this post

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my solve media says spare is big but it was space is big

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When i go into a public toilet and one of the cubical doors is slightly shut, I will be really quiet or slightly push the door to see if anyone is in there.

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Get turned on lookin at my own butt

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

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When I'm stressed, I pick at the skin on my head and pull white flakes out of my hair. There's nothing more satisfying to me than that.

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Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I mouth common words and phrases, just to see what it looks like when I talk to other people.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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close left eye, then right eye to see how things move....

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.