Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

I read these not only for fun, but to feel in touch with my humanity.

When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

Close the Facebook page, after not having a single message in hours, and re open it in a minute, expecting numerous new messages......

When you think you don't hear someone, but as soon as you say, "what?" and they start repeating it, you realize that you know what they had said. But then you don't want to be rude, so you let them finish.

Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

I lift my butt when I'm farting

If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

i always wipe the ketchup off my face with the bread of my sandwich

Whenever someone dies I try to guess who will die next so I wont be as shocked

When I loose something , I buy a new one, then continue to find the old one the next day.

Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

When I'm in the shower I act like I'm filming a music video.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

thinking about how you will never understand who in the world thought it was a good idea to spell "Wednesday" like that

Search up google on bing or yahoo because i feel that google is so much better

When I'm in the shower, you think of arguments that can occur, then think of good comebacks to say to your opponent. And when it actually does happen in real life, you don't have the courage to say it.

When walking in a pub or a mall or any place which has music playing, I walk along with the beats thinking that I will look super cool doing that!

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.