Believing in the kindness of strangers

I imagine myself dying in the worst possible way more than once a day. I don't know...today, I was driving on a bridge and all I could picture was it collapsing and falling onto me, When I'm lying in bed, I imagine my ceiling fan toppling me.

I try really hard to come up with a funny joke on antijokes.com, then I give up and come to this website instead.

Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

When I eat M&Ms, Skittles or Froot Loops, I always make sure to leave one of every color for the end so I could eat them all at once. #rainbowinmymouth

I make all the faces on my money face the same way.

after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

Consume skin around finger nails. Cuticle too.

before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

Sometimes I'll say quotes from movies or TV shows out loud to myself.

whenever im getting a haircut, i feel as if the barber can see my embarrassing and private thoughts.

Sometimes...when no one is home, i talk and dance with my dog as if he was person :)

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

I like to play with the condensation on the outside of glasses, sometimes drawing in it, or just wiping it all off. I get half-way annoyed when it comes back, until I play with it again.

sit in the shower

I tilt my head back and eat grapes pretending like im a greek god

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.