If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Not laughing at funny things on T.V. because nobody is around.

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When bored you watch the minute hand on a clock and try to see if you can see it move

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If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

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Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

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I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

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I sometimes have bad dreams that for some reason I don't want to wake up from because I just want to see what happens next

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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When I see someone who is clearly wealthy, I think to myself "I could do it better than you..."

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

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Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I meow when my cat meows.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.