i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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Doing something bad, then being ashamed because you think your dead family members watch you doing it saying tsk tsk

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trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

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SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

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"Oh, that was a messed up thought, probably shouldn't think about it again or something worse because---GODDAMN IT."

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I sometimes want to eat spaghetti with my hands, but for whatever reason have never done it...

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

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I think source beggars are lazy pest that should be groin kicked

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Stick ur thumb between ur first and middle finger without realizing it

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Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.