Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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You remember something funny. You smile like an idiot. Everyone around thinks your weird for randomly smiling.

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand

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when i m in a car i'll look at the letters on license plates and try to think of words that you can make-or almost make- with those letters

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

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Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.

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Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

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Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

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When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

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if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

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Pee in a glass and pour it down the sink, if someone is using the bathroom already.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

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Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

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When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.