Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

You remember something funny. You smile like an idiot. Everyone around thinks your weird for randomly smiling.

I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand

when i m in a car i'll look at the letters on license plates and try to think of words that you can make-or almost make- with those letters

I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.

Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

Always cover yourself in the bathroom mirror at home because you have this strange feeling that people at school are all watching you through your mirror~pls tell me im not the only one who ever feels this~oh well

When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

Pee in a glass and pour it down the sink, if someone is using the bathroom already.

imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.