lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

Scroll aimlessly through the posts on this website and for some reason, creepily stop and check the comments on the one that has the word "boobs" in it.

wait til the last second to stop the microwave before it dings

you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

When sitting with my laptop on the sofa, and a family member is watching TV in the same room, chuckle occasionally at the screen, just so they know you're not watching porn or something.

google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

Sometimes I imagine how everyone would react if I died.

When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

When im blazed i like of all the stupid shit i did that day but always tell myself "its fine, i didnt feel dumb about those things sober"

Not sure if im holding on to fart or shit

Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

Sometimes while texting or messaging, I enact the physical gestures that accompany what I'm saying as if it were an in-person conversation, even though no one can see me.

when someone goes underwater in a movie I like to hold my breath and see if I would have survived in that situation, I almost died during Finding Nemo

When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

Start to pray at night, but get bored and stop in 2 min.

when i was i kid i use to do the balloon trick where you rubit on your head then when there is enough put it on a wooden floor and while it's followin me i put my hands out and pretended that i was controlling it

When I'm in the shower i let the water run off my arms and fingers and pretend I'm a giant god of water sending torrents to the miniature people below.

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

Whenever I read creepy pastas and there is a picture after the story I get afraid to look at it than when I do I freak out thinking it's going to eat me. Than when I look at it I shout FUUUUUUU.. Than look at it some more and I burst out laughing seeing its a fucking dumb picture.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.