When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)

When i want to write a joke on anti jokes.com i laugh at my friends instead!

When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

If I'm trying to read a clock or bulletin from far away, I instinctively stand and point at it.

I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

Go for a 10 mile run.

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

Learn how to say "I love you" in a different language, just to say it to the person you like and observe their dumbfounded expressions.

Wondering if your life is a TV show, and people are watching what you do.

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Give your neighbors names from movies.

hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

Hearing someone say something but saying "what" because you need more time to think of an answer

Make little rectangles on your desktop when waiting for something to load...

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

suck my own penis

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.