like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

get caught up in youtube comment arguments

Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.