Sometimes I look at a digital clock and try to force the numbers to change with the power of my mind.

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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After getting up from the grass, I use my foot to move the grass I was sitting on around so that there isn't a butt print in the grass.

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I wonder to myself if other people see exactly the same things as me.

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Pee in my work garbage can.

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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thinking your pants are wet when you only just sat down for a long time

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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I wonder if we're actually just dolls and are being controlled by some little girl in her little doll house ....

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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Remember some homework I have to do... On the day that it's due.

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Sit down in a grass field... immediately start pulling up grass.

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When I see lost posters of native parrots I always wonder how could I find 1 in a million

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Go up stairs two steps at a time. Avoid those stairs forever if there are an odd number and I have to end in a single step.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.