Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

you know how everyone talks about making life decisions in the shower and thinking about life?.....yeah thats me on the toilet

Try to think of as many as my female friends as literally possible while masturbating. Rapid Fire envisioning each one I can think of - regardless of their attractiveness - taking my load in one place or another, until I actually cum.

lie in bed, stare at the ceiling fan, focus on only one blade, and see how long your eyesight can follow it.

I set my alarm clock early just so I can get up snooze it.... One, two, three, maybe even four times.

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

losing something in the house, looking for it and then for some reason if I can't find it, I look in all the same places again

Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

Suppress a sneeze and then walk around unsatisfied.

When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

mentally scolding yourself for thinking something dirty just in case the person you're thinking about can read your thoughts

make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.