I stay vigilant while i shower in case killer/zombies come into my house..

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waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

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I think I have superpowers and sometimes I try to use them by force, like lifting a pencil with my mind or elevate from the ground.

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I post morals under every one of my new comments. Moral: Duh, I am moral man ffs! What do you expect! Its awesome! If things go at this phase I will be a celebrity in... hmm... in never!

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I refuse to imagine good things happening to me, because if I did, it won't come true and I end up being suck at everything.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

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When someone is talking to me and I'm not really listening, when it gets quiet I say 'that's crazy' so they think I'm listening.

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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That microscopic flying things that follows my eyes' motion, especially when i look up in the sky.

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i use dental dams

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Wishing you could go back in time and do a situation over again, becuase you regret the stuff you did.

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I chew on anything plastic. I don't think there's a pen that I haven't chewed on or a plastic cap I haven't put in my mouth. It's a horrible habit but it feels so DAMN GOOD TO CHEW!

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while you put your t-shirt on, you get frightened that someone's watching you behind your shirt so you try to put it on as soon as possible.

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get really confused

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When I'm bored I throw a plastic bag in the air and see how long I can keep it from touching the ground.

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Somehow can't find anything good to eat after going grocery shopping... even if you buy Oreos

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I delete all notifications on my phone before i shut it off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.