like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Love an outfit on others/mannequin, but hate it on me!

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pluck dried pieces of poop in your butt hair

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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When i was little i used to see people's cars shaking and wondered why they were listening to a song that just goes "BOOM BOOM BOOM"

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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Seeing someone gettin roasted for something and then making sure you dont do the same thing.

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When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

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When im in a room alone on the computer i like to put on songs and lip sync to them in the mirror with really emotional expressions..

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Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

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Liking your own posts to make it seem like at least 1 person likes you. thinking that maybe someone will be slightly compelled to like it because someone already did.

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avoid going in the handicap bathroom stall because you're afraid someone will see you cause it's so big

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Skip lines to read faster then get confused by everything for the next 10 pages.

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get caught up in youtube comment arguments

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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If someone asks me if I want something and they get up to get it and im sitting down, I say " oh I can get it" eventhough they are already up just to not seem like a lazy piece of shit

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

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When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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Worry that I'm will go schizophrenic.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.