I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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getting a random wedgie when everybody is looking at me

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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conundrum.

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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When I hear a sound that I don't know what is, while I'm in an unfamiliar place, I wipe off and then touch as many surfaces as possible. It makes me think that if I'm taken by some scary person, my fingerprints will be easily found. I'm not sure why that would help in many cases, but it makes me feel better.

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I can't leave the volume on anything on a odd number.

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Thinking that you're the only person on Earth, and everyone else is there just to affect you.

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When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

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Imagining a friend can see everything you do during the day through telepathy.

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In the shower, or just when I'm alone, I imagine having confrontations with people in my life and play out the entire conversation by myself, lip syncing the words with emotions and all.

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Walking around store and store clerk asks are you finding everything ok..and you reply yes and you...

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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I rub the ends of my hair because it feels awesome.

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Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

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i answer "why" to questions and then when someone gets pissed i say "when" Hey Jim, how's Mary? Why? Because she's your sister and I care about you. Why? Because you're my best friend. Why? STOP IT! When?

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before i poop so the water dosent splash

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.