When I was younger I used to think that Red bull was a drink that really did give you wings like they show in the commercials

Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.

Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

Going to the very last pages of "Things you think you only do" with the lowest ratings and realizing that they really are the only ones who do that stuff...

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

(2) When listening to someone I maintain eye contact, but don't actually hear a word they say, just thinking about the eye contact...

When I'm walking I pretend that I'm staying in the same place and moving the world beneath me.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

acting as if you can shoot with a banana

Burp, and then automatically say burp afterwards.

Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

trip over nothing. break into spontaneous dancing.

I want to trade bodies and thought processes with my crush, so we could understand each other better.

Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

Flush the toilet right before done peeing so when you're done, the toilet and your pee has been flushed.

Throw mini celabration of clock says 11:11, 9:11 or anything ending in :00

I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

When I have to use my hands to eat my steak, chew the bones etc (do not tell me that so far this is weird and unusual :P ) I wipe my fingers after each touch => use a whole pack of table tissues :D

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.