While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,688

Criticize a porn novel for its poor use of the English language

thumb_up thumb_down -16

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

thumb_up thumb_down -37

When you try to blur eyes and keep them like that when you look around the room.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Attempting to silently sneak a fart, then it erupts from your anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +310

When I'm alone, I just randomly say "I know you're there so I would look awesome if someone was actually there.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

misread dig bick

thumb_up thumb_down -40

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I think of doing something productive, but can't work up the motivation and end up on the internet instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Try to flip the dice at the casino to my number with my mind

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

thumb_up thumb_down -62

when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

thumb_up thumb_down -81

I sleep naked cauz It's dead sexy.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

thumb_up thumb_down +3

play with a knife and pretend to be a master blade wielder

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Look at my eyes really close in the mirror and turn the lights off, wait, and then back on just watch my pupils change size. PS: Really? No way - I could've sworn I was the only weirdo who did that!

thumb_up thumb_down +785

Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

thumb_up thumb_down -48

become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I precisley fold toilet paper , so that I can unfold it and use the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.