When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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sometime i poop in my hand, then put it in the toilet so it makes less noise and the water doesn't splash up my butt.

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When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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i take words i just read or said and sing them to the tune of a song

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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I have a phobia of incest

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Can't seem to manage not throwing rocks into sea/river

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Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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Listen to the same songs for years on end without ever knowing the lyrics because they've been the soundtracks for your daydreams.

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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When listening to headphones, I automatically start lip syncing the lyrics... But stop doing it when people look at me funny..

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Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.