I think SpongeBob and Patrick are rude, inconsiderate a_holes. ... That's right, I'm an adult and I watch SpongeBob. lol

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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I used to be the third most useless invention in the world, and now I am so sad, I mean I lost to a square wheel! Moral: On the bright side, ill never be as useless as Rustin Beaver.

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When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Whenever I get in the shower, no matter what, I always have to pee.

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You know how there is that sound that gives you the shiver? Whenever you here it you shiver and tell that sound maker to shut up, but then can't stop thinking about that sound and find people looking at you and saying "Is it really that cold?" And then you stop thinking about the sound. P.S. I would like to say I have never relized how weird I am! This site has revealed my inner weirdness! -Astrid

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I sit in a chair upside down and pretend like i'm walking on the ceiling.

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Look at my poo before I flush it.

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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if im alone and singing to music, i watch myself in the mirror

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When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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Trying to figure out what form of suicide would hurt the least.

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When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

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Freak out at sudden noises when home alone at night.

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Tough but loving hands!! Mmm them calluses tho!! ^_^

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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I put morals on posts to get a thumbs up. Moral: Posts with morals get thumbs up.

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Being the only one laughing at something on TV, then feeling awkward.

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It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

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Drinking and dialing people I dated.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.