When something weird happens I nod in agreement.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Sometimes when I touch something I have to touch all of the object and with both hands, otherwise I feel incomplete.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

thumb_up thumb_down -35

When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

thumb_up thumb_down -90

Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

thumb_up thumb_down -24

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I sometimes go out of my way to make sure I have my iPhone with me in the bathroom while taking a poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.

thumb_up thumb_down -131

I piss in the bed every night

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

this is a terrible website and i hate you

thumb_up thumb_down -103

Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Tear up when I poop

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whenever I read a book, in my head it all takes place at my own house, or some other familiar location.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When I make croissants from the Pillsbury can, I'll take one of the little triangles and eat it, because I like the consistency of dough, and i like the fizzy feeling of the yeast on my tongue.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.