When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

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When I see a typo ANYWHERE, I feel compelled to correct it, even if there is no possible way for me to correct it

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Whenever I hear someones name being announced on a p.a., in a store for example....I say out loud 'never heard of him/her'

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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I stand under my ceiling fan, looking up while spinning around to make it look still...

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

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If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Change the channel during commercials when you have the remote, when you don't you go insane and say "TURN IT BACK WE'LL MISS THE START!!!"

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.

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If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

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Get sharp pains in your chest whenever you're watching or reading a sex scene.

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I'm ridiculously turned on by the scent nail polish.

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When your the only one home and you hear a slight creak be like I HEARD THAT to scare of any serial killers.

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I wonder do females have morning wood equivalent?

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After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.