I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

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when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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after doing the dishes i get my hands wet after putting my jumper on cause i failed 2 dry my hands propley my arms a f***** cold dammit!!

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I sometimes deliberately miss buses or trains even though I could easily board them.

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draw little triangles while coulouring in to make it seem that theres not so much work -jesse

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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right before I go to sleep, I think about a certain situation. so I will dream about that

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

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Hit the off button on the microwave three times to simulate the sound it makes when time is up.

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When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

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When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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im going to RAPEEEE that girl

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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When I'm watching an episode of a show that I've seen before with a friend, I say a part that is coming up ahead and act like I guessed.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.