Just ocassionally stand up and pontlessly walk around the house when using the computer. Anyone?

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I like to poo while smoking.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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Hang something small in front of the webcam, in case someone is secretly watching me.

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

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I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

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I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

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While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

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"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

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Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.

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think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

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I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

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I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

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I wonder if old women enjoy sex?

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I cant ride a bike

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Rinse off salted nuts before eating them

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when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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When standing on the beach, I try to command the waves to stop.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.