thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Erasing the history cache on the computer after visiting an x rated website.

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Taking the little rings off the top of my bottles.

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When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

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When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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almost asleep and your body randomly jerks and scares you

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When I see something on facebook i dont like, I like it just so i can unlike it.

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Sit there with my hand just resting down my pants casually when I'm alone. It's comfy!

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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Try to imagine every couple I see having sex.

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

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When on a sidewalk I always try to make my last step on the block with my left foot.

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Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

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Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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Shake my hands frantically back and forth when watching the microwave count down or the printer print, as if it will make them go faster.

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

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When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

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Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

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I thought the 2013 film Frozen could have gone longer

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.