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I think people especially my parents, can hear my thoughts
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+514
Slate the game you playing but always go back for more...ie FIFA, Cod!!!
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-105
When you were in elementary school you thought people laughed at Uranus because it sounds kinda like urine and then wondered why it was so funny; the two only sound remotely alike.
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-53
Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.
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-20
I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.
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-40
Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.
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+1,823
Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(
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-49
dont turn my fan up so high cause i think its going to fall and slice me to bits -jesse
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-44
While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.
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-32
Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?
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+1,410
"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.
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-34
Awkward moment... Pretend to send a text.
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-9
I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.
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+142
Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.
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-7
Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.
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+823
think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot
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+6
Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.
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-21
While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.
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+1,935
I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.
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+14
I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.
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-38
I cover my webcam on my when I fap in fear that someone/something is watching.
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+642
I dip my pizza crust in soda
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+126
Cover up the webcam on my laptop because I think someone might be watching me through it.
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-19
See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.
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-50
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.