when you're in the car, look outside and count every single lamp-post until the car stops

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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sometimes i sing and when i do , i make drum sounds with my teeth and you know, all that stuff

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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get really paranoid when you're in a shop's changing room and try and make sure the curtain is fully closed so nobody can see in

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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Pubic hair wishes... While on the toilet you try to pull out a hair... If it comes out close your eyes and make a wish....and throw it into the toilet... Flush... Repeat!

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place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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turning up the volume in your car when theres a car next to you blasting a terrible song.

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Talk out loud so my brother can hear me because no one ever wrote that they can read your minds. And i want him to know ineed him in my life still so I randomly say things out loud to him on accident. People always look at me with hidden shock wide eyed.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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Think about what to say to the person you like and never actually say it .

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Play as both sides on fifa

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.