When I eat potato chips, I lick each side to make sure the really salty part is down.

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I post morals under every one of my new comments. Moral: Duh, I am moral man ffs! What do you expect! Its awesome! If things go at this phase I will be a celebrity in... hmm... in never!

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I give my own posts a thumbs up whenever I have the option and I know that it's anonymous.

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hearing the opening theme music to Disney or 20th Century Fox or whatever and knowing what it is before you see the screen, then wondering if you should feel proud or if your a weird geek.

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Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

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when singing to music on my ipod, i sometimes pause the music to hear how loud I am singing.

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when i meet ppl i often think of them as if two other ppl i know had a baby even if they are the same sex.

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I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

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When riding in a vehicle at night, where the stars are visible, I feel like they're racing us.

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when im lying in bed in summer and im hot i just turn my sheets on the other side so its cool again

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Take nibbles whenever you get to the last piece of your burger to make it last longer.

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Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

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when the teacher is asking the class something and i have no idea I'm looking at the paper in front of me, pretending to still making notes and thinking to myself 'don't take me, don't take me...'

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"Oh, that was a messed up thought, probably shouldn't think about it again or something worse because---GODDAMN IT."

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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After reading some good posts here, I skipped to the last pages just to find out really sick people and stupid things.

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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Wipe drink can with shirt after someone (mainly father) has had a sip.

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When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

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If I'm walking in the mall and realize I'm going in the wrong direction, I can't just double back, 'cause everyone would think I'm dumb for going in the wrong direction. Instead, I perform a slow U-turn to the other side of the walkway; either that or pretend to get an important text/phone call that forces me to do the quick turnaround. SAVE!

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Ur mum

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.