I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

I dip my pizza crust in soda

Get that shiver when you're peeing.

feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

I freak myself out during class/assembly/family dinners that someone there can read my mind, then just on cue I start thinking about sex and have to change my train of thought before they think I'm strange. Then I go round in a circle (clockwise of course) and scream their names in my head to see if they look so I know who reads minds.

i randomly grab my boobs when i'm home alone. like, all the time.

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

My hoodie/jacket strings HAVE to be equal in length, or I pull them then restretch the hood out to make them even.

When no one is around I make sound effects for everything I do.

When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

Locking your pet in the room and forcing it to spend time with you.

as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

Hoping if I fall asleep on the couch while my family is in the room I dont have a dream about sex and wake up moaning and groaning...

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

Videotape my mother in the shower.

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

when liking something you like or dislike something you click it twice even though you know it will only take one vote

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.