when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

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When I’ve got something cooking in the microwave, before actually looking to see how much time is left, I try to guess how much time is left; if I’m correct within 3 seconds on the timer, I actually feel a measure of accomplishment.

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I wonder sometimes if I've ever met my future self.

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Hold your breath when you go in bridge tunnels and compete against your friends to see who can last longer.

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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Sitting on the toilet and feel devastated I forgot my smartphone and then spending the rest of my time on the toilet thinking about how boring it is without my smartphone.

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I plan to put money away everyday but never seem to do it.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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*Sees bug on wall while taking shower* *Splashes with shower water* *Bug slides down wall* >_

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I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

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I post morals under every one of my new comments. Moral: Duh, I am moral man ffs! What do you expect! Its awesome! If things go at this phase I will be a celebrity in... hmm... in never!

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Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

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Opens new book to random page. Reads snippet. Smiles to myself when I reach it 1 week later. -epsin

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I control water in the shower.

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When climbing onto an escalator, I cannot just step on it and go, I have to mentally prepare myself and time my steps to get on, especially if it's going down, cause I'm terrified I will fall off... I usually end up irritating the people behind me trying to get on, as it takes me almost 10 to 15 seconds to find the right step.. And also, I cannot touch the escalator's sides.

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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Every time I see my self in a mirror, I feel like I'm watching someone in a different dimension and make quick movements to see if they mess up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.