Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

Scan forward to best parts of songs, rarely listen to entire song.

Listening to romantic hollywood sad core and feeling depressed because your single.

when i watch tv and it cuts to break, if i hear someone on the tv tell me not to change the chanel, ill say "u cant tell me what to do!" and then ill change it.

I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Pick my nose with my elbow, that way I keep my nails clean.

I think I have superpowers and sometimes I try to use them by force, like lifting a pencil with my mind or elevate from the ground.

Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

Kick the fallen ice cube underneath the fridge

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

Smiling like an Idiot when you get a cute text

When im alone in my car i talk to myself about lifes issues

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.