SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

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Nodding while talking on the phone then remembering the person can't see you

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fart then blame it on the guy next to me realizing theres no one near me and everyone looks at me....awkward

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Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

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Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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Before I go to sleep, I imagine what it would be like dating a really hot actor or singer and think of dramatic scenarios that could happen.

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"

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You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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Before I go to bed I have to put one of my hands between my knees in order to warm up and get comfy.

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I scratch and sniff.

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Playing with your phone or remote throwinng it up and down until it hits your face

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Think that my ice tastes different than my water.

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Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

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Playing hide-and-seek and finding the best spot ever, only to realize you have to pee

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Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.

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After watching a movie, always walk out the theatre feeling like a total bad ass

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fap

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.