On the train, try and mathematically make (add,subtract,multiply,divide etc.) the carriage number to get to ten

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I randomly hold my boobs in my room.

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say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

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invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.

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Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

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Clicking Yes to "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service" without reading one word of that stupid thing.

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I keep tearing the little piece of skin next to my thumb nail until it hurts - and even if it bleeds I have to get it off.

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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worry about getting a little butt sweat mark on a chair if you've been sitting in it too long while its hot.

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Pretend to talk on the phone when you see someone you don't want to say hello.

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I pretend that I've caught the man in the walk/don't walk sign doing something bad and I stare at him accusingly

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Suck up stuff with the vacuum you know you shouldn't because your too lazy to pick it up.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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play on your game for ten minutes before you realise why you stoppedd the last time

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.