Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Start to tell a story, but realize that nobody is bothering to listen to you.. So you slowly let your voice fade off

thumb_up thumb_down +51

When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

thumb_up thumb_down +49

I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

thumb_up thumb_down -74

Pee in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down -170

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

when I have an itch on my hand I scratch it with my stubble

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If I'd see a grizzly bear in the forest I'd probably try to run away even though every sane person says that that's exactly the thing you shouldn't do

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Sometimes when im sitting in class i start thinking how i would save the whole classroom if someone was to come in with a gun and start shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +99

Sit on the loo and think about life because I can't be bothered to get up

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

refuse to like a post because the number is too perfect and you don't want to screw it up

thumb_up thumb_down -47

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

thumb_up thumb_down -38

When I have a really good dream, and I wake up and realize it was a dream, I try to fall back asleep and re-visit the dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +119

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.