I can read people's life's and figure out the truth about them with out them telling me how their life is

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Play with my own boobs for no reason

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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I'm paranoid of EVERYTHING. When I enter a room, I inspect it for cameras. When I'm in the bathroom I cover all the cameras on my iPod, Phone, etc. When I do something I'm not supposed to do on the computer (such as download music for free), I cover the webcam to assure the government can't see me. I control my thoughts 24/7 at fear that someone will read my thoughts. I have a strict feeling the someone is always watching me. I fear subliminal advertisements also. To sum everything up you could just read the first part. I DONT TRUST ANYTHING OR ANYONE! I'm Not sure if anyone else is as paranoid as I am...

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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When I get "interactive" commercials on my laptop screen, I like to "just shoot 4 out of 5 ducks" and feel like I have cheated the system.

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close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

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I pretend I'm a musical when I'm alone and sing about all the stuff I'm doing.

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If I have a black surface I scratch my dandruff onto and make a dandruff galaxy.

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Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Pee in the shower

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I post morals under every one of my new comments. Moral: Duh, I am moral man ffs! What do you expect! Its awesome! If things go at this phase I will be a celebrity in... hmm... in never!

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Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

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Stare at people until they notice, and when they notice watch them out of the corner of your eye until they turn.. and then you continue staring

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.