When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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Make pictures on the bathtub wall using the clump of hair from the shower drain.

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When you accidentally mess up a password, delete the entire thing and redo it since you don't know which part you messed up.

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A song comes on that you hate but you sing with it anyway because you know the lyrics

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Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

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Moral: Damn I clicked on pointless super powers how did I get here! Moral: I wrote the "thing only I do" below :P

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

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Checking your phone for a text when you know you don't have one. Matt

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

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Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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In school look at the wall or something and feel like only a few seconds has gone by but really thirty minutes has

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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After using the restroom at someone's house I turn on the water and proceed to check myself in the mirror while the water runs and sounds like I'm washing my hands then I turn off the water and walk out.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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Sometimes I cant sleep without something making noise , like a fan .

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When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.