feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

Ever dreamt of being naked and then waking up in horror.

squezzing moisturisure/tooth paste really hard cos the top is all dry and then a shit load comes out all at once

When serving grilled steak, I always make sure I get the best one.

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

stand in front of a mirror with your headphones in, and lip sync the words of the song playing to pretend you are singing in a music video

Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

sometimes i poop in my pants and like the smell of my poop. Smells like whatever i just ate.

I twist my pubes into little spikes when I pee.

you turn the dial on your microwave until it reaches as far as it can go

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

wen on this website go look at the most disliked

I pretend that someone can see through my eyes whenever I'm doing something cool, i guess so they think I'm cooler or something.

When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

Create a post on this site, and then feel really depressed when I get a ton of thumbs down, even when I give MYSELF a thumbs up.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.