when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

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When bored in class.. I catch eyes with someone across the room and look away fast, then act "cool" for the next 10 minutes because I still think they're looking at me...

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Putting pressure on my closed eyes and seeing fireworks behind my eyelids

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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seeing small spots in your eye (dust probably) and then chasing them with your eye trying to catch them

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I have never watched Star Wars.

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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Imagine I'm walking in slow motion when I enter a bar or club

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Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

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I pee in the water of the toilet to make bubbles

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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make it a point of interest to know every word to a song that nobody likes. (i.e. call me maybe) >.>

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

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Only taking half a biscuit because it makes you feel bad and then taking another half of a different biscuit.

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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When taking trash up to the street, I always runback as fast as I can, counting down from 5, pretending there's a sniper about to shoot me.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.