Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down -82

whenever I come across a website like this, I try to read through every post as fast as I can. When I reach the end, I feel like I accomplished something but sad I have no more to read.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

shag your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -87

When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

humiliating little girls

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Eating chicken at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I never side with the majority (if given a choice.)

thumb_up thumb_down -26

While trying to sleep I obsess over the little red LED on the TV set which I can't even see unless I lift my head from the pillow.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

When you have the " If I'm on an elevator and it breaks and is about to crash at the bottom, and I jump up before it does, will I live?" thought.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Tape your dick to your leg to fit into tight pants

thumb_up thumb_down -98

have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Reherse jokes/phrases to say to friends in school tomorrow

thumb_up thumb_down +25

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -48

hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +104

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -78

When I'm on Facebook, I don't like anything in my news feed thats older then 15 minutes or else i'll feel like they think ima creeping on them.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Vigorously scratch my head over a black surface and watch the dandruff fall like snowflakes....then eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.