Sometimes I try to solve a math problem using my finger and my thigh, and when I make a mistake a erase it with my hand.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

sometimes i close my eyes and i rub them to see psychedelic drawings

thumb_up thumb_down +133

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

OMG have you ever realized that one of your eyes is showing everything more reddish and the other one showing everything more bluish just like these old 3d glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -55

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When I have a really good dream, and I wake up and realize it was a dream, I try to fall back asleep and re-visit the dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

When I'm in a hurry I brush my teeth while peeing because I think it saves time.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

draw pictures on the mirror from the shower steam

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Fill up a glass, drink half, then fill it up again.

thumb_up thumb_down +362

Attempting to silently sneak a fart, then it erupts from your anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +310

Look to the right, and see nothing. Look to the left, and see nothing. Look to the right again, and see the chick from the ring (or some scary shit) standing there.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I have to keep reading website pages until I reached 5, 10, 15 etc. When I get close to my age though, I can finish there.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

When I'm in the shower, I talk to myself, usually about my plans for video game procedures.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.