I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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Boy:did it hurt? Me: Did what hurt? Boy:When you fell from heaven. Me: I came frome the pits of hell! Boy: Well then...O__O

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I always find myself criticizing some commercials on television like the first time I see them I think nothing of it but the third or fourth time I think hey wait a second...

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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When I'm in the shower, I'm afraid something might try to kill me so I shower with my glasses on.

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Make pictures on the bathtub wall using the clump of hair from the shower drain.

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I keep tearing the little piece of skin next to my thumb nail until it hurts - and even if it bleeds I have to get it off.

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wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

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pleasure my self... because I didn't they automatically censored certain words

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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When I am bored, usually in class, I simulate what I would do if the zombie apocalypse was occurring right now.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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Wonder who decide what news stories we see and don't see?

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

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misread flashlight

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When a song comes on that i hate on the radio, i sing along with it because i know the lyrics. (Example: something by Justtin bieber D:)

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.