Sometimes when im in my bed and trying to fall asleep, i don´t want to open my eyes in case there is a murderer standing before my bed.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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Imagine that other people can see what im doing, then try to act differently.

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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I eat ass

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Sometimes I like to count the amount of steps it takes to get upstairs/downstairs. Then I realize that the number is never the same.

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I mute music videos and watch them to completely different music.

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Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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never push to hard on the railing of a tall building, just in case its loose and you end up falling off.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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sneeze without closing my eyes

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.