Think about Facebook chats when your offline!? P.S Am I the only one, REALLY!

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

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Make little rectangles on your desktop when waiting for something to load...

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I have always belived that I invented calling Target " Tar- jhay"

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Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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When you try to blur eyes and keep them like that when you look around the room.

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Think to myself "If I would have stuck to my diet I would be at my goal weight by now"

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.