1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

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When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

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The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

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Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.

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I make it sound like i'm ordering for more than one person when I'm really only getting fast food for myself.

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Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

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If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.