I stare at the paint impasto on the ceiling until I see faces.

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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Wherever I drink something, I count how many times I swallow it, and I feel weird if it's not a multiple of 5. I will get more of the drink and drink it, even if I'm not thirsty, just to make my life seem a little more complete...PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one?

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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I lie in bed and when I get bored I try to convince myself that I'm lying at the other end

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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Look at the clock to realize that it seems like the "second" hand is taking longer on the number its on right when you look at it, and/or you looked at the clock at the absolute perfect time. And it happens frequently..

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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Not being able to balance in heels because the insides are smothered in foot sweat. -_-

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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Any time I hear someone speaking with an accent, I start mimicking that accident. –Ikka

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i smoke weed all day.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.