jack off

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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I pee in the shower. :3

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I stay vigilant while i shower in case killer/zombies come into my house..

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That microscopic flying things that follows my eyes' motion, especially when i look up in the sky.

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Pee in the shower

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Scared to flush the tolite at friends houses in fear that i will wake someone up of break the tolite.

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I **** with no hands.

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

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feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

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Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

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"Hey, did you see that new episode last night?" "Yeah!" "Do you remember that part when he ran through the city?" "Yeah!" LIES

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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When I do a fresh pile of laundry I throw them on my bed and lay in them.

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Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.