1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

blow nose. look at kleenex.

I like to eat grilled cheese with ketchup

I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

Getting bored when a page is loading and scrolling the wheel on your mouse back and forth one click.

I make it sound like i'm ordering for more than one person when I'm really only getting fast food for myself.

Run up all stairs two at a time, and memorize all the staircases with odd number of steps. On those, I start with one step so I can end on a two.

Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

Ladies ; wear the thin underwear with the really skinny jeans & pants , & save the thick underwear for the baggy jeans & sweatpants ..

When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

If im eating food i shouldnt and i dont want anybody to know i jump if anyone comes in and catches me.

I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.