when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

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I open the shower curtain when I get in the bathroom to make sure no ones there.

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

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lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

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Mix up "I'm starving," "I'm freezing," and "I have to pee," in my head, and then say them out loud the wrong way, in times of extreme starving/freezing/needing-to-pee desperation.

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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While walking past someone thats wearing sunglasses you stare at them and wonder if there staring a t you aswell

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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Whenever I send or receive texts, I always make it a point to have more received texts than sent ones. It makes me feel popular.

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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Reading these, realizing that you don't do some of the things on the top of the list, and wondering if you're weird.

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when someone is talking about something i have no idea of and then asked me if i agree I'm like: oh yes! and then promptly changing subject so they won't find out

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Whenever i am watching TV my parents always walk by at the worst part like a sex scene or a dirty joke.

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when i realise for example that my shoes are stinking i get really paranoid and try to cover them under the table or something because i feel that everyone is thinking about it or is covering their nose or stuff

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When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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put my headphones in but don't listen to any music so people don't bother me.

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I never feel bored

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When listening to music on computer make sure your singing the words and act cool just incase the singer of that song and some other people you admire are watching you threw your webcam.

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Swirling your hair through your hair while something is loading.

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looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.