When I'm in the shower I condition my pubes so they get nice and soft.

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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wonder if anyone is on at 12 A.M. log on to a social network and realize that theres a lot of people on

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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sleep with your legs crossed like your meditating.

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Make up a song to yourself.

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When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled. -Ikka

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I Think people can read my mind....."if you can read my mind nod your head or don't if you don't want me to know that you can" It doesn't work either way but yeah thats just me lol

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Put things in the front of the dishwasher 1st cause im to lazy to pull the whole thing out to put anything in the back or the right place.

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I dont know weather or not to flush the toilet at night incase i wake somebody, its even worse in other peoples houses.

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See how fast and accurate i can use the fast forward on my dvr and applaud myself when i go full speed and stop 2 seconds before the show is back on.

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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I have a cat that drops on it's side when she sees me coming

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Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.