Purposely save one piece of homework untill Sunday night in case you want to get out of doing something boring.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Pretend i'm a sim.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

thumb_up thumb_down -136

call someone by a siblings name.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.

thumb_up thumb_down -76

When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Eat something that will make crumbs over the sink because you are too lazy to get a plate

thumb_up thumb_down +15

sometimes i wonder how it would be to think in another language and i try but cant

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When talking to someone you sometimes start with the middle of a story through the end, complete with random details that seem totally unrelated to them, and THEN you remember to tell the beginning (which is the part that actually relates to what they were talking about).

thumb_up thumb_down -54

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

thumb_up thumb_down -76

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

thumb_up thumb_down -80

Hthe temptation to go up on the roof but when u get to where u go out get freaked and run away

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

When you can feel yourself blushing so you pretend to be preoccupied with something else.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Worry a lot about the efficiency of your path when walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Food is always tastier the SECOND time you heat it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Every time i get a new video game i read the back of the case and the pamphlet the whole ride home

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

thumb_up thumb_down -44

I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.