when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Try to see nipples through body paint.

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after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

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put the volume on the TV as an even number, and feeling uncomfortable if it's on an odd number

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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I'm so afraid of using words incorrectly that I look up any word I'm not sure that I'm using properly before typing it into wherever I'll use it. If the definition is too vague, I abandon the word and try something else.

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Everytime I look at the clock it see so say 4 20 9 11 or 11 11

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Smell a fart and don't react until someone else does.

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getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

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I like to swallow great ammounts of water just to make the loud "clunk" sound in my throat.

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See a ridiculously hot girl and wonder to myself "who is the guy who gets to have sex with her. And why does she like him?" As if that can help me bag an equally hotter girl.

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.