Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

Cross the street or go some other way to avoid the awkward moment of long lasting side by side walking (a move known as the 'overtake') when walking right behind someone who is slightly slower than you.

For some reason, I smile whenever I'm telling someone bad news or a sad story. I always try to not smile, but it doesn't work and I feel like a terrible person.

When tapping, I always have to do the same pattern of taps, and I feel incomplete if I don't finish the pattern I started.

When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

I pee in the shower.

Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

When home alone, you feel the need to turn on every light/appliance so you won't hear the serial killer who you are sure hides in your basement

whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

Sometimes I stay as still as I can and stare at myself in the mirror until it scares me and I freak out about who I am and why I'm living. I have to think of my family and memories to snap out of it.

I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

Smell your hands to see if there dirty.

When I say, "What?" after understanding exactly what someone said.

I scratch the scabs on my head whenever im bored

When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.