When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

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Whenever I go to the toilet on an airplane I worry that during the time I'm there the plane will drop out the sky.

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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I meow when my cat meows.

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When i think about something hilarious that happened previously and laugh about it days later at the most innappropriate time.

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Admit, that most of your saved files on you´re computer have titles like: sdfdshleh / sjjs87 / sjflekeh

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Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

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I make weird crazy faces at myself in the mirror whenever I leave the bathroom.

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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when you wave at a car thinking its someone you know and it ends up being some old lady.

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Fear that the CIA is secretly wathing you.

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Make little rectangles on your desktop when waiting for something to load...

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I have always belived that I invented calling Target " Tar- jhay"

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Feeling guilty for something you haven't done.

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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Love feet. like LOVE feet.

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I always get paranoid when I go to take a shit because I leave the computer on and somebody comes in the room where the computer is.

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.