Waking up @ 4 AM wondering where your pillow went

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Look an ugly person up and down and try to think of ways that they can improve how they look. ( clothing, hair, and makeup)

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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Thinking you could be in a "Truman Show" style scenario and scanning areas of your house and possessions for tiny little cameras and microphones.

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Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

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put an excessive amount of lead in your pencil

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Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

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Questioning why they make the Captcha's(spamblocker) SO hard to read

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Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

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Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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conundrum.

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When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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I smell or rinse cups before I put water in them. Even if they are clean.

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I cannot f***ing believe how many of these i do... and now i feel out of place

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When ever I touch something a certain way I have to touch it again exactly like I did the first time

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Forgetting the same word over and over again and having a spaz attack when you can't remember it for more than a couple of seconds.

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

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Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.