place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

thumb_up thumb_down -30

When texting someone on the toilet & they ask, "What are you doing?" I respond with, "Oh, just chillin." LOL. -Jade

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When you are thinking, and you think about what you are thinking. You are automatically purposely thinking until you stop thinking about it. I am thinking about thinking about how I think right now. I think...

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Think about awesome stuff that you could do (e.g beating up someone who steals your gf's purse or something) when listening to music

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Sometimes I think the whole world is set up, and I feel like I'm living in some kind of Truman Show. I even sometimes say "I know you're there" to the moon.

thumb_up thumb_down +437

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

When you're bored or alone, you think of an argument you had with a friend recently, then think of all the things you should've said and get all powered up inside, but then you realise it's too late -_-

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

thumb_up thumb_down -4

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Simultaneously apply pressure to my ears to make the surrounding noises sound weird Tristan J.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Get so angry you hit a table, wall etc but hit it so hard you feel as though you've broken you fingers and this just makes you even angrier.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

When in the shower hit the plug like a bath then just sit there for a few minutes as the water fills up.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

jack off

thumb_up thumb_down -31

When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +87

When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I pee in the shower. :3

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I stay vigilant while i shower in case killer/zombies come into my house..

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.