Scratch my scalp and look around the place if there is someone watching me (if no one does) quickly smell my fingers

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Putting salt on dry toast, yum!

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.

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sit in the shower

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when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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when i'm in a really good mood i think everybody is watching and admiring me

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listen to madonnas new album

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Press cancel on your toaster before it finishes so that you can eat faster

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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If I'm walking across a road and a car stops to allow me to pass, I say 'Thank you' even though I know full well they cannot hear me.

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eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

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The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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going to bed at 10:30 pm realize i have to check Facebook go to YouTube randomly watch 2 hours of nothing, then find my self pulling an all nighter cause its 4 am and i got school.

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Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

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Think someone's watching me so I do cool stuff to impress them just in case they are

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try as hard as possible to not use the last of the toilet paper so you don't have to change the roll and inadvertently force someone else to do it.

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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Always run up the stairs as if someone was chasing you.

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I give my own posts a thumbs up whenever I have the option and I know that it's anonymous.

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When alone and listening to music I pretend that I am the artist and dance around the room like its the music video or I am on stage.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.