wonder if anyone's watching you and try to seem like a decent person

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Sometimes when I'm excitedly hurrying out of the house, I skip for a brief moment.

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When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

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Try to think of something nice then thinks of then scariest things.

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When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

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Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

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When i'm eating M&Ms, I save one of each color until the end so I can eat them all at once.

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I always have to remake my bed right before going to sleep in it

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See someone thats so hot all you can think about is seeing them naked all day.

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mindlessly touch my laptop or desktop PC's screen after having just used a tablet.

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I take receipts out of the ATM's disposal slot in order to see how much money people that I've never met have in their accounts.

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Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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Dance in the car just so the person you like will see you and be like "Aw, cute" but then they don't even see you so you stop...

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I put big spaces in between comments

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When driving and a song come on about death I switch the station because i'm afraid its going to happen to me

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When In the car, use th bug guts to ramp up all of the culverts and when you don't have a landing for a while, pretend that you got a speed bonus and are soaring with some amazing air.-dillon

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

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When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.